sober support for everyone
Hubby is giving up alcohol <gasp>
Mr Mac is not a huge drinker. 2-3 beers on a weekend and maybe 1-2 beers through the week. Absolutely nothing like the daily drinking I was doing. You might say ‘why give up then’? but the question playing on his mind is rather why can’t he give up? If he drinks ‘responsibly’. That is, within the recommended 14 units per week here in UK. Why is it such a struggle to stop altogether? Now, that is the question isn’t it!
OMG it’s been three months since I last wrote. I have wanted to write many times, but I never did. Even when I had a crappy day, I’ve just got through it, though I KNEW I would have felt better if I just blogged.
What’s that all about eh? This blog is mine, to vent, rant, whine or celebrate anything and everything I want. For some reason, even when I want to blog, I’m hesitant. Like I’m not worthy or something. I seriously need to not over think stuff and just do it.
I’m just back from a trip to the Lake District here in the UK. It was my 40th Birthday last week and I have been planning a short trip away to celebrate the significant day.
2 years ago when I quit drinking I couldn’t think about my 40th birthday without wanting to celebrate it with an insane amount of alcohol. I always thought I’d have either cracked the whole being sober thing or I’d be back drinking again by now.
Back when I was 7 months sober, I met a woman who was nearing 2 year sober anniversary. I remember thinking “she’s a proper sober person”. Now here I am 2 years sober myself, I guess I’m a proper sober person now!
When I was drinking, I wasn’t living. My world became so small and lifeless. I am so proud to be sober, everything about my life is better now. My world is bigger, I do more and I’m learning more about myself. Everything is just more!
Come on Spring, where are you? I am sure I suffer a little from SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder). I’ve been up and down for the past few months. One minute, I want to be left alone; hibernate as I can hardly muster up the energy to do anything. Then the next minute I’m pissed off I never go anywhere or do anything fun! I cannot win eh!
My anxiety is pushing back. I’ve been feeling overwhelmed by things that don’t usually bother me. Kids school commitments and finding a new hairdresser. Talk about first world problems.
Well, my son is back. My anxiety was up and down all week. Not helped by my daughter falling out with one of her school friends part way through the week. However, on Saturday we picked my son up from the airport and I feel whole again.
We have all learned something from this experience. My Son has gained more independence and a skiing badge! My Daughter has learned that she does miss her big brother after all. My husband and I have both learned that for all we missed our son terribly, we survived and we can rely on each other for moral support. I have learned that I can sit with uncomfortable feelings as long as I remember to use my sober tools.
My son left on Saturday to go to France for one week on a school skiing trip. I am finding it difficult to say the least. Many times over the weekend I have sat with uncomfortable feelings of loss and anxiety. I worry if he is okay and enjoying himself.
Continue reading “Dealing with Uncomfortable Feelings – Day 662”