The Dreaded Weekend – Day 16

So far in my short journey of sobriety, I have found weekends to be by far the trickiest. I think this is because in my drunken days, weekends were always that time of the week where I drank without feeling guilty and I didn’t give myself a hard time about how much I was drinking because basically everyone else was doing it on a weekend too.

Unfortunately, unlike everyone else, I used to carry on drinking into the following week and not stop, which is when I had to hide my drinking and definitely gave myself a hard time about it.

Anyway – the reason I find weekends hard is because I miss that short time where I was able to drink without restrictions or guilt, I looked forward to it. Now, I’m not going back to that life, no way. I’m starting to see that it wasn’t the drink that was making it good. It was the not feeling guilty and sad that made it feel good and I get that now every day because I don’t drink – does that make sense?

The other part (which I’m working on) is having something to look forward to. I’ve stopped the guilt and remorse part but I haven’t replaced the ‘something to look forward to’ part. I believe this is why weekends are tricky.

I have read lots of blogs so far, which all say to be prepared for these hard times. Whether it’s coming in from a hard day at work, relaxing after putting the kids to bed or a weekend night in. We have to be prepared for our triggers. Mine is definitely Friday or Saturday night. I love all the advice out there and take it all on board. (anything that may make this journey easier is good right?)

So, tonight I feel prepared. I have planned something to look forward too. I have some organic energy drinks in the fridge (which I’ve not had before). I’m having a pizza ‘pig out’ with the family (because once I’m full I’m less likely to want a drink) and if all that doesn’t help, I’ve even got a sneaky chocolate bar just for me in the cupboard.

Obviously, this is my Saturday night coping strategy, it may or may not work, but I’m looking forward to it and I think at the moment (regardless of the calories I’m about to consume) it’s a good thing.

So, to everyone else out there whose struggling with the weekend. Plan something nice. Go out for a walk. Cook a nice meal. Rent that movie or pig out on takeaway and chocolate like me haha. Be just that little bit selfish. We’re all doing great x

P.s – Let me know what you doing this weekend to cope….

Mrs Mac